It has come to our attention, that almost everyone, under necessity, is a neologist. Here is a record of the outstanding entries, supplied over the years by our friends, who, finding themselves unable to find the perfect word, invented it.
Uniquities- A portmanteau word coined by our friend Andrew to express the sometimes iniquitous and foible-ridden quirks of the world around him. I first heard this glorious word one day when Andrew was driving my car and we were road tripping for spring break. The word was used to describe… me… as in “It’s just one of your more loveable uniquities, dearest.”
Wopsways- Here my transcription of the spelling may not be wholly accurate. This brand new word was coined on Sunday by our friend Walter to describe the universally natural habit of a body running in circles to lean toward the center. The situation was simple. Two little girls were orbiting some very tall young man in the narthex. I commented that they were preventing dizziness by moving rather sluggishly, and said that any faster and they’d make themselves puke. Walter responded that they could run faster if they “ran wopsways”.
Snizzle– Snow+ Drizzle. You’ve seen a lot of it this year so far, if you live in the upper Midwest. We’ve gotten about 3 snizzle storms in the last three weeks. This was invented by a coworker named Ruby. Full marks, Ruby, brava!
Splendorkle- After inventing my theory that anyone could make up a word if required, I walked up to a coworker and said “Yo, Alex, invent a word.” He said “mmmmm Splendorkle.” Just like that. Apparently it is derived from some song…and means the process of self extrication from a bizarre or awkward situation of your own making. According to Alex, one would thus say “I had to create quite a splendorkle to get out of there.” n.b. Terpsichore believes that this may be a verb, that if you are in the process of creating the splendorkle, you may be splendorkling. Which, she correctly points out, sounds rather like an endearment. Therefore, as a derivative:
Splendorkling– a diminutive endearment, used of awkward people who can’t seem to extricate themselves graciously from even the simplest situation. A Bertie Wooster.
Poozle– invented by a teacher of Terpsichore’s who allowed homework to be turned in on notebook paper if and only if (iff, henceforward) they tore or cut off the poozles. You know, the ratty looking shreddy bits at the side of the paper formerly attached to the notebook.
And finally, a word invention fail, so you can see that this neologizing does go sour, and sometimes publically.
Cinedigm– “A new paradigm in cinema.” No, really?! This uniquitous marketing agent should go forth, and attempt a valiant splendorkle (perhaps by running wopsways in the snizzle?) to counteract his own folly.